I'm Chinese but I grew up overseas. There are Chinese people here but they are mostly from the South and have slightly different traditions and different accents, but fortunately I've met many Northerners like me and I have a buncha friends, both local and from China. My Chinese is much better than my Singaporean classmates and I am admired for it, (my English too, but only because my classmates speak Singlish at home most of the time) but my written Chinese actually really sucks, especially when compared to an actual Chinese person's, and I feel completely disconnected with my relatives. When we use WeChat to shipin, I usually just push the phone into my mother's hand and get her to talk. Plus I can't understand many Chinese words, and I can't memorise Tang Shi Song Ci (Ancient Chinese poetry& stuff), and I only know a tiny bit about the Ancient Chinese Dynasties and historical figures, and I can barely speak a full sentence without using an English word, like I would say, " 快来吃饭， 记得先wash your hands “ I don't think I would survive if I was sent back to the Mainland, even for a year. Despite declaring that that would be no racism at all in SG, some Singaporeans actually despise me for not being local. Ironically they are usually not the Malays or Indians, but the Singaporean Chinese. I mean like once we visited a place during the pandemic, and we gathered with our friends to take a photo before separating into groups of 2 or 3. We stayed apart during the trip, but then the staff ( who were all Chinese) on duty called us out for our brief gathering. I mean, there were huge groups of people ( more than 10) and they were even taking off their masks and not staying apart, and they were like right in front of us, but we were the only ones fined. Probably 'cause we were speaking Chinese with strong Northern accents. Hey ppl my passport says I'm Singaporean! And then I always get super upset and sad whenever a local classmate says," My Chinese sucks" or " I don't want to be Chinese", because in my opinion, everyone who is Chinese should be proud of their origin and their part to play in this 5000-year old culture, instead of just throwing the chance away. I'm actually quite often shunned for being born in China though I grew up here, most people don't really mean it, but every now and then some people will drop a few hurtful words without realising. Some classmates think their praising me, saying "You're so Chinese!" , but they are also highlighting our differences. I'm more hurt when my mother just says something about my being less Chinese than I should and how I speak too much English at home, and how she compares me with kids in China and tells me how lucky I am to be in SG and that I really should spend a few years studying in China to catch up with the Chinese kids. I don't really want to be "Singaporean", coz I think their culture is "inferior(no offense)" to mine, but the sad truth is I don't really belong in China either, I don't think like my parents and relatives, I don't like the high expectations. Perhaps I only feel "Chinese" because I feel different from Singaporeans and that's the only other identity I have. But then in China, I would also feel like an outsider, and maybe then I would be more Singaporean.
me: A whopping 30 meters off the ground 30 meters off the ground 30 METERS OF THE GROUND emirichu: what? get with the program! this is America! me: oh ok. lemme see... 32.0802 BLESS GOD AMERICAN YARDS OFF THE GROUND emirichu: amen.
It’s ironic that I’m the other way around coz even though I was born in a white area and grew up there, I still feel like I don’t fit in with my “white side”
"Can understand it but has trouble speaking it" really it home for me 😭 especially when you can understand a specific place accent of the language like a brooklyn accent or southern accent. spanish is hard :]
Watching this, I teared up and cried a bit bc of how much I relate to this. I’m Chinese Canadian and grew up relatively speaking, writing and just mainly using English instead of Cantonese. I’m able to understand it and speak basic Cantonese phrases, but that’s about it. I pride myself in how fluent and literate I am in English, but my parents seem to think otherwise and just consider my brother and I to be white-washed. What’s even worse is that since there are multiple Chinese dialects, mandarin being the most common (I think), my parents are even more disappointed that I’m not able to speak, write or understand mandarin at all, and frankly, I’m embarrassed as well. I recently got into watching donghuas (lol basically Chinese anime) and reading Chinese web novels (translated versions ofc) and I think that pushed me even more towards my desire of wanting to learn Chinese, specifically mandarin, but I’m super embarrassed to do so. My parents assume I’m not interested in improving or learning Chinese, but it’s actually the opposite and I want to be able to consider myself “fluent” in it one day, the thing is, I just want to be able to learn at my own pace without any embarrassment, judgement or expectations from my parents and those around me. And omg, I relate so much to the feeling of not fitting in when going back to your parents’ home country, the language barrier is so painfully evident whenever I go back and visit... especially since my dad’s side of the family speaks a whole different Chinese dialect other than Cantonese (so I can’t even understand them). Analsjskajsjskajs lol this is a long ass comment,, I just,, I just had to get these feelings and thoughts off of my chest. ah it’s like 2 am and I have school in a few hours yet here I am
I’m actually American so I speak English. And honestly, I don’t want to learn any other languages to talk with others. And that’s one of the reasons why I can’t make friends.. all of the schools I have been to have a lot of Hispanic people. Which means a lot of them don’t speak the same English that I do. Yes, some of them can speak English but it’s really hard for me to understand them because their English is not that great. I’ve always had a hard time making friends that aren't online. Just because of the language I speak. And there were some instances where I’ve had friends for a year and then the next year they would just ignore me. And honestly it made me insecure. Not just about my language, but just myself in general. And I know speaking English is very common and a lot of people can do it. But it’s hard to make friends also because if their parents don’t know English. Like I could never meet up with people who were Hispanic because their parents wouldn’t be able to speak English. But that’s probably the main reason why I can’t really make friends that are not online.
I have a similar problem with Bulgarian. I do live in Bulgaria, and do need to use it, but except for talking with my parents and doing groceries, I just use English. Weird thing is that my parents are kinda proud that I know a language they don't, but still don't like when I use English at home
Not Asian, but damn I feel the same with the spanish side of my family. It's the one I was the closest to when I was younger, but it is the one I feel the most disconnected because of the language barrier, and even though I want to learn spanish... I don't remember anything, and I feel out of place with them ;n;
I think it's very American to only speak one language so you were good integratet in America Ah I(European) love making jokes about Americans because Europe is so much better
I'm going through a bit of this myself rn. I love my Mexican heritage and we'd go visit family in Mexico nearly every summer when I was a kid. But, I grew up in a mostly white city, with white friends and speaking mostly English. My sisters grew more in touch with our Mexican culture, hung out with Hispanic friends and listened to music in Spanish. They're always calling me out for being "too white" and it's seriously annoying. The fact I'm very pale doesn't help.
I relate 100%. My parents being South-American, raising me in Sweden; It's weird. Like, I always talking in Swedish with them, as they speak in Spanish. My relatives, however, are fluent and weren't raised much too different from me. I just couldn't catch up with both languages, with English being the third language. It creates a very clear and weird contrast; I'm too "white-washed" for my root culture, and too foreign for the Swedes, so I get this identity crisis. Also, moving to Japan didn't make that any easier as I was constantly reminded by people over there that "I don't look Swedish". I could probably write an essay about this, but this will do. Thanks for this video! Can't believe I missed out on this one.
Well I spent 6 years in a Chinese elementary school and guess what? I can only speak Chinese and barely read! I'm fluent in English with an American accent given that I grew up watching Hey Arnold, Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, etc. Both my parents are English educated (Dad went to a Malay language government school and studied university in the States, Mom went to a convent school and yes I'm Malaysian) and can't read Chinese although both are fluent in Cantonese, my dad can't read or write any Chinese but my mom can just a little. One of the reasons my mom cited about my inability to read Chinese is during standard 2 (2nd grade if I'm not mistaken for Americans) I forgot to bring my textbook and my teacher threw me and my bag out of the class, according to my mom that was what caused me to shut down and stop wanting to learn Chinese. So I slugged through elementary school for 4 years only knowing how to speak in Chinese but not read, making it even more difficult because the textbooks for subjects like math, history and so on and so forth are written in Chinese. Thankfully I passed my final year exams for elementary school but I'm still taking Chinese as a subject despite being in a Malay language government school, this is because according to my record I spent all my years of elementary school in a Chinese school. I'm still trying to improve reading Chinese (I can write just fine, if you show me a Chinese character I can most likely write it in the correct order) but it's definitely not easy. I'm assuming in the States you call Asians who can't exactly speak their native language twinkies, but here we call them bananas And for Malaysians reading this yes, I can speak, write and read Malay and hold a conversation in Bahasa Melayu
I can relate to this, but I'm not Asian, I'm Hispanic and I was born in Texas, my parents were both born in America, my mom Texas and my dad from California, and both with a (primary) Mexican background, me and my sister and cousin, grew up around a bilingual house hold, our parents, aunts, and grandma and grandpa would speak English and Spanish, our grandma and grandpa would primarily speak Spanish but did understand English, our aunt's would usually tell us as we had grown up to learn how to speak Spanish, since a majority of the family had did, we all grew to understand most or some Spanish, hell, even some of us can speak it in limited fashion, but I unfortunately never was taught as much by my mom, and my aunts and grandma would always say, "why doesn't he or she (my sister) speak Spanish?" or, "why haven't you taught them?", it always dawned on me that something was wrong with me cause I couldn't speak my family's native language as well as I could English, even at one point when I was a little kid, my family said that we're Hispanic, primarily Mexican, but I thought that was wrong for some reason and said, "no I can't be, I'm American!", they'd laugh at me for saying that cause I was still a little kid, but I still found it hard to believe that was true, and that they wouldn't take me seriously, (they still don't take me as serious, and I still do to this day hate it, I'm an adult now.) But as a growing teenager, I soon grown to accepting my ethnicity and how special it really is, even my best friend who I met in middle school, who came to America from Mexico, in a way, showed me a lot about Mexico I had previously hadn't known, and I've grown more to accept it gor how truly great in can be, but yeah, I accept my culture and what it represents to me as a person, and I'm proud.
If I was that lady at the blueberry picking I would be like: That's so cool! You can understand and respond to another language! (P.S. I love the idea of how your nationality is a plant, it's really creative! Also be proud of your background, it's what makes our history.. in a way!)
Ik how she feels, I don't speak Patois really well and other people who have came to the U.S. from Jamaica or who have jamaican parents, like I did, made fun of me because I couldn't speak it, btw either it was back in 2005 or now in present day, I would've still thought korean music was cool, I love listening to different genres of music and I love learning about other cultures, I always have.
Ngl, Kinda relatable, I have Chinese parents but I just hated learning Chinese, so I never really learned and litterally cannot speak Chinese and can barely even understand it. (Like I can somehow still speak 2 laguages competently (Dutch and English) but people have called me not knowing Chinese as “a shame” so many times I don’t even wanna count).
Im is and american mexican Indian and I cant speak spanish so if my grandparents try to communicate or have a convsation I would respon to the no español meaning no spanish or I dont speak spanish
My mom is from the Czech Republic.. and my dad is from Egypt.. so, when i was younger i was talking to my dad Arabic but now i am watching Dream SMP, animations, anime, and i watch them in English that means that i am better at English.. and i feel kinda sad.. because my dad is always sayin' i miss your Arabic.. :/ or something close
Iam a pinoy that actually is fluent with english. i can speak without an accent but i have been bullied for using tagalog and english in one sentence and thats why i learnt english now after 2 years here iam trying to learn Japanese now lol
@lifegoeson i did. I moved schools for succeeding my skills, improvement, and etc as a child:( its just i didnt know much english back then now my new rude ass school thought me more english than i expected lol. Now i gotta speak english in every subject
i find that common when you guys speak. I've never seen that with other people (mixing two languages). I assume it's because there are some words that don't exist in the other, so you have to mix it. Don't mind the bullies lol they're just ignorant
My friends always say I don't really have an accent because I am fully Chinese and grew up in Hong Kong. I was never enrolled in an international school and was only enrolled in local schools. My sister studied in an international school. My parents wanted me to excel in Chinese. This year I was finally studying in the UK and I was so Chinese and they thought I couldn't speak any English. My other Chinese friends were very white-washed and that made me stand out a bit. Who relates??
This is so painfully common for children of immigrants :( I'm Mexican-American and I related to everything here.. I'm trying to embrace my Mexican heritage and improve my Spanish but it's hard when you feel like a failure.
better than being called a communist (im english by birth from europe..... behind the iron curtain) but i speak a lot of russian, german and english but i prefer to use english here (oh btw my parents speak english only)
I can agree- l heard way too many people say that my English is really good, BUT WATCH ME SPEAK CHINESE OHHOH all the people that have seen me speak Chinese have said, "Why do you have an accent when you speak in Chinese?" Idk maybe because l was born in America Why is it that l feel the same way for anything as in talking or just saying hi to people that are Chinese too- like l always run into a room so my parents won't say, "Oh *blank* is here to say hi!"
Its kind of weird how this only applies to asian americans. U wouldnt expect a black person to know an african language or a white person to know a european language
Yesss! Thanks so much. Im from Austria and America. I feel like a disappointment because my parents say I’m to lazy to learn another language and whenever I call my ancestors I act like I understand them when I really don’t.
kinda weird how I relate to Emirichu a lot in this particular situation, except my parents are Nigerian, and instead of two brothers, I have two sisters. T^T
Im indonesian, but I speak english more. At home or school or Anywhere else. My indonesian is OK. I can still communicate in Indonesian. But sometimes I don't understand what there saying 😅. I also learn Chinese because my family is half Chinese. Anddddddddd I'm not fluent. All I can say is Hi My name is _____ Sorry I don't know wht your saying Can I go to the toilet And etc
Me, I'm the most Caucasian person you could ever see, but I'm trying so hard to incorporate as much Japanese culture into my life as possible. So kind of an identity crisis, in a way, I guess?
I don't think that's an identity crisis. You're just trying to learn about another culture, which is amazing! I can learn about a totally different culture even though I have no strings tied to it. It's just a learning experience. It's not like I am not trying to be so and so. That'll make me a "weeabo" or "koreaboo" or whatever. Sorry if this sounds confusing.
My grandpa spoke three languages Russian, German, and English because my great grandparents were from Russia and Germany then came over here during ww1 when my great grandfather was a young boy. His father died in Russia in 1915 so his mom had to remarry in order to come here as well as being sponsored by family friends that had already fled the country.
I agree a lot I am Pakistani British American yes that is a lot and my parents know Punjabi and this other language I CANT SPELL AND I DONT WANT RACIST COMMENTS and I only speak English I think my mom has been ashamed from the longest time now probably wanting me to learn how to speak her language what I should know but since I have never learned I never got better and I have probably learned only 1 word in 2020 this relates to so much people and thank you for putting this out there and this is really helpful for people lie, me that had to go through parents being ashamed and basically everyone.
The albums at 1:59 and by who: Map Of The Soul: Persona by BTS Square Up by BlackPink Yes Or Yes by Twice For the last one, I know it's by Monsta X ant that's all I know
i dont have that identity crisis but like i just dont really like uhm asian people who want to have white parents instead of asian parents. I mean im not like white yikes but like you know, gurl korea is a great place with a lot of culture things, im as a vietnamese also like korea. it just you havent explored that much and try, and see good things about your orginal country. it just so sad that a lot of asian-western start to lost their identity
I have an identity crisis about my ethnicity too, but it's for a totally different reason, I don't know my dad, nobody know my dad, and I live in the country of my mother, the country I have always known and which is my country. But some time I catch me thinking "where am I coming from" , I want to reconnect with the culture of my "father's country" but idk what is this country. Yeah stupid problems
